Excerpts of a day in the life.
My 9 yr. old: What’s the most dangerous thing you’ve ever done?
Me, to myself: Umm, taking 6 shots in a frat house when I was underage before I knew my (abysmally low) tolerance to alcohol.
Me, to her: Umm….driving home to Miami from Orlando when I was reeeeeeeeeeaaaallly tired.
Later, during dinner
Me, to myself: Oh lord, how do I tell a 5, 7 and 9 yr. old that they should stop, excitedly, telling me about how their nanny illegally immigrated?
Afterwards, stopped by Caffe Luxe 5 minutes after closing (because there were still people sitting inside).
Me: Would it at all be possible to still get something?
Barista in the back: We’re cashing out the drawer.
Barista in the front: How about I’ll make it for you and I just won’t charge you. How about that?
And then a very important thought while I was driving home:
I wonder what happens if you do coke & heroin at the same time. Do they cancel themselves out? Like when I watch Oprah’s Lifeclass and then follow it with Basketball Wives.