An excerpt.
Seriously. It was epic. Imagine this. On loop. Fo(u)r hours.

Michael Pollan
Sustainable farming practices
Santa Barbara
Twinkling lights
Hand towels
Softshell crab
Pajamas
Excedrin
The complete disaster known as my senior prom
La Cabaña
Black & Milds
Softshell crab
Adele’s new album
“I wonder if there are people out there who genuinely don’t like me. The only 2 I can think of are Jennifer Johnson & Vanessa Henderson. High school and college. Oh, and Brandi Clark. Jr. High. Though, in my defense, I don’t get what’s so wrong about saying a girl has a big mouth when she does, in fact, have a big mouth. Haha. Ah well. At least that’s a better reason than thinking my skin is too dark and whatever it was that Vanessa didn’t like about me. Are there others? Do I have enemies?”
Emails
Hurt feelings
Figuring out the reason in the reason/season/lifetime scheme
Softshell crab
Dogs
DVRs
Sushi
Text messages
Letting go
Jamie Oliver
Fate
Money
Hot stone massage
Headache
The Hunger Games
Softshell crab
San Francisco
Portland
Oprah
Getting cards made that say on the front, “I don’t date and I don’t hook up. Still interested in talking to me?” And then on the back, “Well, I’m not.”
Overripe peach/papier-mâché heart
The way British people say “pa-pee-eh mash-ay”
Magic
Avocados
Softshell crab
WHY THE $%^# AM I NOT ASLEEP?!!?!?!?!??!
This is why I can’t have kids